


to be loved and to be in love

by thevirtch



Category: Figure Skating RPF, Olympics RPF, Sports RPF
Genre: Break Up, Death, Drama & Romance, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Romance, F/M, Friendship, Love, Minor Character Death, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-17
Updated: 2020-07-20
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:46:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24229855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thevirtch/pseuds/thevirtch
Summary: “It was an honor to get to love him, wasn’t it? To be loved and to be in love.” He recites, their old phrase spoken like a promise between them.Oh, Scott. He always knew exactly what to say.
Relationships: Scott Moir & Tessa Virtue, Scott Moir/Original Female Character(s), Scott Moir/Tessa Virtue, Tessa Virtue/Original Male Character(s)
Comments: 19
Kudos: 32





	1. Chapter 1

_It was the smell of smoke that woke her up. She blinked, trying to let her eyes become accustomed to the darkness. She slid out of bed, careful not to wake Peter, and slowly opened the bedroom door._

_Walls of hot, red flames greeted her, momentarily blinding her line of vision._

_“Peter! Peter! Oh my god! There’s a fire!” Tessa screamed, slamming the door in a futile attempt to stop the flames from entering the bedroom._

_Her husband woke with a jolt, immediately registering the situation. Tessa was beside herself._

_“Sophie! Oh my god!” She cried, moving to open the bedroom door once again. She had to get to her daughter._

_Peter was already there by her side, putting himself in front of her, and gesturing for her to stay in the room. He rushed out, calling his daughter’s name. It took everything in Tessa not to run after him._

_They were going to die._

_She was certain of this, because she just saw her husband run into a warzone of fire. And there was no way in hell that she was going to jump out the window, to escape, even if it meant that she, too, would be consumed by the flames. She would rather die than leave her family here._

_A minute passes, but to her it feels like a lifetime. Tears are running down her cheeks, and she mutters a silent prayer. Please be okay. Please don’t die. Please. Please._

_Another minute goes by, and she can’t hear anything under the roaring flames, but one moment it’s all fire and the next her husband emerges, their precious baby in his arms._

_“Thank God, thank God,” she whispers, pulling them into an embrace._

_Later, an ambulance takes them to the hospital to do some medical checks. In the examination room, they run some tests by Peter and treat a burn on his cheek, as Tessa tries to soothe a distraught Sophie._

_“It’s okay, sweetheart. We’re okay,” she whispers, planting a kiss on the crown of her head._

_Tessa turns to her husband, saying, “you’re a superhero, you know?”_

_He smiles, and then looks back at Sophie, assuring her that “we’re safe now.”_

_“I called Jordan, she’s coming to pick us up,” Tessa informs him, and he gives her an appreciative nod, but his attention is still focused on their daughter._

_Their three-year-old is still shaken by the incident, and whimpers against Tessa._

_“Why don’t you take her to get some food?” Peter suggests, looking back at his wife._

_She’s reluctant to let him out of her sight, but complies, asking if he wanted anything before picking Sophie up and taking her to the nearest vending machine._

_They spend a good few minutes choosing snacks, Tessa welcoming the distraction for Sophie, because her little girl has finally started to calm down._

_She doesn’t realise the time passing until a man with a kind face comes up to her and asks if she is Mrs Evans._

_“Yes, hi!” Tessa responds, smiling at the doctor._

_“Mrs Evans, your husband went into cardiac arrest. It was catastrophic, and I’m afraid we’ve lost him.”_

_“I’m sorry, what?” She replies, because surely this has to be a misunderstanding._

_“I regret to inform you that your husband has died. I’m so sorry,” he repeats, looking at her concernedly._

_“No, I think there’s a mistake? We were just in for a burn and a check-up,” she says, waiting for the doctor to tell her that he got the wrong person, because this cannot possibly be happening. His expression doesn’t change, but she still refuses to believe him._

_“He’s fine, I just saw him,” she continues, picking Sophie up in her arms and walking towards the examination room._

_“Mrs Evans, is there someone we can call?” The doctor asks._

_“Are you insane? Can you please give me some space. Peter?”_

_She stops. Her body goes numb. She thinks she’s going to faint._

_“Mrs Evans, I’m so sorry for your loss,” someone tells her, but she barely registers it._

_Pulling her daughter away from the room, she fights the urge to throw up all over the hospital floor. She falls to her knees, breaking down in sobs. She vaguely remembers someone taking Sophie from her, later realising that it was Jordan. Her sister held her daughter and tried to comfort Tessa, saying, “shhh, Tess. I know. I know. I’m so sorry.”_

The funeral was a quiet affair. He had gotten the call from Jordan the night before, and he had driven down the very next day to London, Ontario to pay his respects.

As he approached the chapel, he recognised a few old friends, but his mind was mainly on her. He spotted Jordan at the door, and she pulled him into a tight embrace.

“Thank you for coming. It means a lot to her,” she whispered, letting him go.

He nodded, asking “is she inside?”

“Yes, she is,” she replied, and Scott moved into the chapel, footsteps muffled by the carpeted floors.

The chapel was filled with guests dressed in black, contrasting its white walls. His heart stops, because he suddenly sees a little girl sobbing in the corner, unbeknownst to everyone else. 

He moves to comfort her, and when she sees him, her eyes open wide. Green meets brown.

He kneels down in front of her, and he instantly knows who she is. He would have recognised those eyes anywhere.

“Hey, love,” he says gently, offering his hand to her.

She hesitates before tentatively putting her hand in his.

“Are you lost?” He says, the sea of people crowding around them, none of them noticing this interaction. She is the spitting image of her mother, dark, wavy curls framing her porcelain white face, and eyes the same shade of green he spent the majority of his life staring into.

She nods, wiping a tear from her eye.

“I can’t find my mommy,” she says timidly, and starts crying again.

He immediately pulls her into a hug, holding her closely to his chest. He can feel her tears against his shirt, and his heart breaks into a million pieces.

“It’s okay, shhh, I’ll find your mommy for you, okay?” He assures, releasing her.

“Are you Scott? Mommy talks about you all the time,” she says quietly, her eyes meeting his once again.

“Yeah, I am. What’s your name?” A rush of affection surges through him.

She mutters her name, and Scott doesn’t quite catch it.

“Elle?” He asks, unsure if that was what she’d meant to say.

“Sophie Giselle,” she says once more, this time a little more clearer.

“Hi, Sophie. Let’s find your mom, okay?” Scott says, letting her take his hand.

She nods, and lets Scott lead her to the front of the chapel, where he immediately spots her, her back turned away from him. 

Just as he tries to move in her direction, Sophie remains rooted to the ground, not wanting to approach her.

“Mommy’s sad,” Sophie explains, looking at Scott concernedly after he gives her a quizzical look.

“She is,” he says, unsure of what to do.

“She says you always make her smile. Can you try, please?” She pleads with him, and his heart melts.

“Okay, love, I’ll try,” he promises, and this seems to satisfy the little girl.

They move towards Tessa, Scott letting Sophie move in front of him. He’d spent the last 24 hours replaying this moment in his head, but somehow he can’t seem to remember what to say.

“Hi, sweetheart,” Tessa says as soon as she sees her daughter, bending down to speak to her. 

He sees Sophie whisper something into her mother’s ear, and Tessa’s eyes immediately shift to his.

Green eyes, filled with so much depth, filled with three years of love, pain, and regret that threaten to overflow and drown them both out. He moves towards her, and he might as well as be floating, because he can’t feel anything.

Before he knows it, she’s hugging him as if there’s no tomorrow, as if he is the only thing that is keeping her together.

“Oh, Tess. I’m so sorry,” Scott says, holding her tight, and she fits her head into the crook of his neck. He kisses the crown of her head.

“He really loved you,” he continues, and she nods, placing her hand on his cheek.

“I loved him, too,” she responds, a fresh wave of tears streaming down her already tear-stained face. 

Scott moves to wipe them off, saying, “He was the best, Tess,”

“He was,” she says with a sad smile.

“It was an honor to get to love him, wasn’t it? To be loved and to be in love.” He recites, their old phrase spoken like a promise between them.

Oh, Scott. He always knew exactly what to say.

_This was it. She was going to be married in a matter of seconds. Staring into Peter’s eyes, she replayed all the things she was grateful for in her head. She sees her best friend, standing behind her soon-to-be-husband, and she gives him a small smile. Scott has been by her side throughout her entire life, and she was so happy to be able to share this moment with him. He returned her smile, giving her a small nod: You got this, kiddo._

_After the vows were exchanged, the party began. She danced with Peter until her feet hurt, and spotted Scott midway through her first dance. He plastered a smile onto his face, but deep down she could sense something was wrong. She almost chased after him when he turned to leave, after all, it was twenty-two years of pure instinct. But then Jordan started making a toast and Peter pulled her into a warm embrace, and she watched as he disappeared around the corner._

_Afterwards, she excused herself and went to look for Scott, not having gotten a chance to speak to him in the hours prior because she was so busy with the wedding, and felt quite overwhelmed by the festivities. She found refuge in the same place he did, on a small balcony separated by a curtain._

_“Hi, Scott,” she says, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear._

_He turned around, forcing himself to smile._

_“Hey, T. Congratulations, you look beautiful,” he replies, tone sincere, but she could tell something was still bothering him._

_“Party too loud?” She offers, joining him against the railing._

_“Sort of. You?” He asks, his shoulder bumping against hers._

_“Yeah. I can’t believe it. I mean, this is all just,” she laughs, “a lot.”_

_“I bet. They’re all celebrating you, T,” he says,_

_“I know. Sometimes it feels like it, and I’m so grateful. But I just needed to escape for a little while,” she says inconsequentially._

_“Well, I’m honored you decided to spend it here, along with the hundreds of mosquitoes on this balcony that are probably going to kill us,” he replies jokingly, and she can’t help but laugh._

_A song comes on, one that they’ve danced to before: Long Time Running._

_A surprised laugh comes from Scott, and he shakes his head. “That’s crazy.”_

_“Universe, one. Virtue and Moir, zero,” she jokes, then asks with a tone of utmost sincerity, “Dance with me?”_

_“There’s nothing else I’d rather do, Virtch” he says, and they sway silently in the moonlight, her head resting on his shoulder, and she wants time to stop, wants to capture this moment and store it in her heart forever, because it feels so right._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi i'm back!! this was inspired by a scene in This Is Us (if you haven't watched it, please do, you'll be better for it) and i probably took the longest to write this one. also, happy birthday tessa virtue!!


	2. Chapter 2

After the service, the guests file out to the reception at Jordan’s house. Scott hangs back for a little while, hoping to talk to her again, but she’s overwhelmed with people coming up and giving her their condolences. He gets into his car and makes his way to the reception, stopping by a Tim Hortons to grab a cup of hot chocolate and a box of doughnuts for her. 

When he reaches her house, he sees through the glass windows that the guests were already starting to fill the living room up. He doesn’t enter the house yet, but manages to spot her in a conversation with Jordan, eyes full of grief and sadness. 

Somehow, she senses him, and her eyes shift to focus on him. Her expression changes to something unreadable, and Scott can see her leave and make her way outside. 

“I didn’t get to see you at the end of the service,” she says, walking towards his car.

“I left to get you these,” he replies, raising the box of doughnuts in one hand.

She immediately breaks out into a smile, and walks to the passenger seat to join him. 

“You didn’t have to,” she says, but doesn’t refuse when Scott hands her the cup of hot chocolate.

“Here, I got the chocolate ones,” he says, offering her a donut. 

“I’m not that hungry,” she responds, avoiding his gaze.

“Tess, you have to eat something,” he continues.

“I’m fine,” she says, sounding so unconvincing Scott almost laughs.

“Tess, no offence, and I’m only saying this as a friend, but you look terrible,” he admits, looking at her.

There’s a moment of silence, and then they both start laughing hysterically. She rolls her eyes, telling him to “give it here,” and takes a miserable bite out of the donut.

“Don’t pretend like that wasn’t the best thing you had all day,” he says, taking one for himself and biting into it, making overexaggerated noises of satisfaction. This makes her laugh even harder.

“Okay, okay. It’s so good,” she admits, allowing herself to enjoy the donut.

After a while, Scott says, “You know, just because he’s gone doesn’t mean you should feel guilty about living life.”

“I know. I just need time,” she says, finishing her donut.

He nods, understanding completely.

“Take all the time you need, T,”

She looks at him expectantly, licking the excess chocolate cream off her fingers, asking “can you get me out of here?”

“You want to go for a drive?” He suggests.

She nods, and they make their way to an ice cream shop they used to go to when they were kids, after many long hours of skating lessons at the rink.

He holds her close to his side as they enter the shop, and they breathe in the scent of their childhood and whipped cream and nostalgia.

“So, how are you, Tess? Three years is a long time,” he says, testing the waters. He knows she tends to get into her head a lot, and is trying to distract her from her grief.

“It is. I’m okay, it’s different being a mom, you know? I have different life goals and focuses now,” she says, cheeks turning a little red.

“You’re a great mom. I knew you would be, T,” he says, looking at her admiringly.

She blushes a deeper shade of red, and asks, “what about you?”

“I’m helping my mom at the Ilderton rink on weekends, and then the skate shop whenever I’m free. Other than that, I’ve been just chilling in between trips to Montreal to help Patch with his juniors,” he says with a smile.

“That’s nice. Anything besides your professional life?” She asks the question he’s been dreading.

“Well, Em and I broke up, if that’s what you’re asking,” he says, hoping that his tone doesn’t betray his feelings.

“I’m sorry, Scott,” she says, taking his hand in hers.

“Not your fault,” he says, looking at anywhere but her.

“Do you want to talk about it?” She offers, squeezing his hand.

“We just wanted different things,” he says, then adds, “she didn’t want kids.”

“Oh, Scott. I’m sorry,” she replies, leaning her head on his shoulder.

“It’s okay, it just wasn’t meant to be, I guess,” he says, shrugging.

“You’ll find someone someday,” she assures him.

The sun is almost setting when they arrive back at Jordan’s house. Tessa invites him in, despite his protests that he should get going.

Before they enter, she squeezes his hand, just like she did before every competition, saying “thank you, Scott. For letting me forget, even if it was just for a day.”

“Anytime, T,” he says, returning the squeeze.

When they enter, there are considerably lesser guests, and Jordan, holding a tired Sophie, heaves a sigh of relief when she sees them.

The little girl gets down from Jordan’s arms and runs towards her mother, who hugs her tightly.

“Hey, sweetheart,” Tessa says, mouthing a “thank you” to her sister.

“Hi mommy. Are you feeling better?” Sophie asks, looking at her mother.

“Yeah. I’m still kind of sad, though, but Scott made me feel better. He always does,” she replies.

The little girl looks up at him in adoration, and he can’t help but smile back at her. 

“Hey, Sophie, do you want a doughnut?” He asks, offering her the last chocolate donut in the box.

“Really?” She says in disbelief, looking towards her mother for permission, then thanking him profusely for the treat.

“Chocolate is my favourite,” she says sweetly, giving him a hug.

 _There’s no doubt about it,_ he thinks, _she really is Tessa Virtue’s daughter._

Later, when all the guests had left, he silently suggested that he should get going. 

“Where are you staying?” He asks, because the fire left her house in ruins.

“I got a rental, half an hour from here. I stayed here with Jordan for a while, but we didn’t want to intrude,” she replies.

“How are you going home?”

“Jordan was going to send me,” she responds, and he immediately offers to drop her off. In spite of her multiple protests, he convinces her to get in his car, because “it’s getting late” and “your sister looks tired”. To be honest, both were true: Jordan looked like she hadn’t slept in months.

Scott helps install Sophie’s car seat and before long they are on their way to her rental. He lets her choose the music, and they sing the whole way back home, just like they did when they were teenagers and they had their weekly road trips to and from training. 

When they reach her rental apartment, Scott offers to carry a sleepy Sophie in and settle her in bed, but before he manages to release himself from her, the small girl pulls him in, whispering, “thank you for making mommy smile.”

“Of course. Anything for you, Elle,” he says with a wink, using the name he’d misheard when they met earlier that day.

Sophie laughs, an identical one to her mother’s, then says, “goodnight, Scott.”

“Goodnight, Elle.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i will finish this one day. until then, thanks for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

Scott wakes up the next day in his bed, his mind immediately on the green eyed beauty who’s been in his dreams for as long as he can remember. He texts her, telling her that he’ll be at her place if it’s okay, and sets off to her house, stopping on his way to pick up some breakfast for them.

The rental is a quaint white house, and he gets a better view of it in the morning light as opposed to the previous night. He gently knocks on the door, and is greeted by Jordan Virtue.

“Oh, hi, Scott,” she says, clearly taken by surprise at his presence. He doesn’t blame her.

“Hey, Jord. Is Tess up yet?” He asks, trying to sound as casual as possible to cut the awkward tension that engulfs the both of them.

“She is,” Jordan replies, but says it slowly in a way that makes Scott feel uneasy as she runs her eyes up and down over him.

“Is she okay?” He decides to take the direct approach, as Jordan closes the door behind her and steps outside.

“She’s doing as well as you’d expect. It’s Tessa, you know how she gets,” she says with a sigh.

And he does know. He knows how closed off she can become, how she internalises her emotions, never letting the cracks show.

“Scott, listen, don’t take this the wrong way, I’m glad you’re here for her, I really am. But she’s grieving, Scott. She needs to find a new normal. And you showing up here four years after,” she pauses, taking in a deep breath “after you left, Scott. Do you have any idea how hurt she was? By all of it?” Jordan is staring intensely into his eyes now, but then they both hear the peltering of footsteps and the door opens to reveal a very tired looking Tessa.

“Jojo, who’s there? Is it Scott?” She asks as she opens the door, and her eyes meet his.

Jordan’s complexion changes as she shifts her gaze from him to her sister.

“Hey, Tessie. Listen, I’ve got to go. Bye, Scott,” she says, looking at him pointedly before rushing off to her car.

What Jordan said took him by surprise, because he’d never even considered Tessa caring about him after essentially removing himself from her life at the drop of a dime. Okay, that’s rather unfair. He knows that he was her best friend, and painting her as a cold hearted person isn’t exactly true. But hurting her? He couldn’t even fathom the possibility of that happening.

Tessa raises her eyebrows at her sister’s quick departure, but then smiles as her gaze rests on him. 

“Hey, thanks for dropping by,” she says softly, pulling him into a hug.

“Anytime, T,” he says, hand stroking her back. He feels her tears as they hit his shoulder, and suddenly she’s crying against him. 

His heart stops, because he knows Tessa rarely publicly shows any sign of distress, but he also feels comforted by the fact that she feels safe enough to let it all out in his presence.

“Tess, it’s okay. You’re going to be okay,” he soothes, stroking her cheek.

“I know. I’m just sad, that’s all,” she says, her voice breaking. 

“It’s okay, let it all out, T. I’m here, we’ll stay here for as long as you need,” he says, and she clings on to him tighter.

“I lost him. I lost the house. All the memories, everything,” she says after a while, quickly wiping the tears that fell from her eyes.

“You have Soph. I know it’s hard, Tess. Hell, I don’t think I’ll ever fully understand what it must feel like. But you’re the strongest person I know, T,” he finishes, wiping a stray tear from her cheek.

He holds her as they walk back into the house, and he sits her on the couch before covering her with a blanket. 

He fixes up the breakfast he brought, even though it’s gone slightly cold from standing outside for too long. As if on cue, Sophie saunters into the kitchen, one hand rubbing her eye, clearly having just woken up.

She freezes when she sees Scott in the kitchen, and he tries his best to give her his most winning smile.

“Hey, Elle. Had a good sleep?” He asks gently, transferring the pancakes to the ceramic plates.

“Hi,” she says shyly, before asking, “where’s Mommy?”

“She’s in the living room. Hey, do you like chocolate chip pancakes?” He says, after realising that Tessa probably wouldn’t want her daughter waking up to her mother crying on the couch and thinking that breakfast was the perfect distraction for a three year old.

The little girl’s eyes light up, and Scott hands her a plate which she dutifully takes to the kitchen counter and struggles to climb the stool set up, as he rushes to help her. She perches on the stool, and Scott asks her if she prefers milk or orange juice.

“Milk, please,” she says in a silent tone. She reminds him so much of Tessa in their earlier days, and how she was never a morning person to begin with. He chuckles fondly at the memory.

He hands her the glass of milk, and she says a sweet “thank you” before looking at him curiously.

“You’re the only person who calls me that,” she says after a moment.

“Sorry?” Scott says, not really following.

“Elle. You’re the only one who calls me that,” Sophie responds, taking a bite of her pancakes.

“Oh, is that okay? I can call you something else if you don’t like it,” he says, but she shakes her head.

“No, I like it. It’s like the nicknames you have for Mommy,” she replies.

“Yeah? Well, I do give incredible nicknames,” Scott says, smiling at her.

This draws a laugh from her.

“What do people call you, then?” She asks, looking back up at him.

“Just Scott. Sometimes Tess calls me Scotty when she’s being extremely annoying, but no one else is allowed to call me that,” he says, shrugging.

“Mommy’s annoying?” Suddenly a look of surprise washes over the little girl’s face, and she almost drops her pancakes.

“Sometimes. Don’t tell her I told you that, though,” he whispers, as if he was letting her in on a secret.

“I won’t. Pinky promise,” she says, reaching out her tiny pinky finger to Scott, and they swear on it. Sophie finishes her breakfast and reaches for him to carry her off the stool, except she clings on to him when he tries to place her down, and rests her head on his shoulder. 

“Let’s bring some breakfast to Mommy, eh?” Scott says, carefully picking up the plate of pancakes with the other hand and walking to the living room.

“You know, she doesn’t warm up to people easily. You might have broken a record or something,” Tessa says, looking up at her daughter perched on his hip. Her eyes are red-rimmed, but she looks better than she did previously and her daughter climbs into her arms.

“What can I say, girls love me,” he says, handing her the plate once Sophie is comfortably settled by her side.

“Thank you,” she says, accepting the plate. It’s her favourite, and she almost starts crying again at the fact that he remembered.

“Anytime, Virtch,” he says, looking to Sophie as if to say “see, doesn’t she love me?”, and Sophie smiles.

He goes to get her a coffee, and hands it to her. She takes one sip and sighs at the fact that it’s made exactly how she likes it.

“Nice touch,” she says contemplatively, looking at him fondly.

“Anything for you, T,” he says with a wink.

“I can’t believe this is what I’ve been missing out on for the past three years,” she says.

It’s as if the air in the room shifts, and an uncomfortable silence blankets them. It takes a moment before she realises what she just said.

“Tess, I-”

“No, Scott, I didn’t mean it like that-”

“It’s okay, I know.”

“Okay.”

“Okay.”

Sophie looks in between the both of them, eyes bouncing from one adult to the other like she’s watching a tennis match. When the silence grows too loud, Tessa clears her throat and suggests to Sophie that she could show Scott the backyard.

“Really?” Sophie is practically beaming with excitement, and she takes Scott’s hand and leads him to the yard.

The little girl breaks her grip and speeds off, accidentally tripping on a stone and before she knows it she’s on the ground as Scott rushes to her aid.

“Hey, it’s okay, you’re fine,” he says, bending down to examine her knee, which is badly scraped up. She’s sobbing on the grass, and buries her face in his neck.

“It’s going to be okay, Elle. We’ll get you cleaned up, okay?” He says, trying to soothe the agitated child. He picks her up and carries her inside, where a very concerned Tessa waits.

“She tripped and fell,” he offers as an explanation, and she nods, rushing to get the First Aid Kit, a look of understanding between them.

He places Sophie on the counter, trying his best to calm her down.

“Elle, hey. It’s okay, mom’s going to patch you up real quick, and then your knee will be good as new,” he says, brushing a tear off her cheek.

“It hurts,” she sobs, voice breaking.

“I know, kiddo. You know I used to play hockey, and I would fall on the ice and get scrapes and bruises all the time?”

“Really?” She stops crying in apparent interest at this anecdote.

“Yep. All the time. But I’d get bandaged up and I’ll be out there again,”

Tessa’s back with the First Aid Kit, and Sophie positively screams when she attempts to clean her wound.

“Hey, kiddo, it’s going to be okay, you’re so brave,” Scott says, but she’s thrashing on the counter, making it harder for Tessa to clean the wound.

“You’re so brave, Soph,” she says, once she’s done and the wound bandaged.

She immediately stops crying and almost jumps off the counter but Scott manages to catch her.

“Woah, woah, woah, kiddo! Calm down,” he says, but he’s laughing.

“But I haven’t shown you the yard yet!”

Scott spends the rest of the morning at her house, and offers to send Sophie to daycare when Tessa’s caught up with errands to run.

“Don’t worry about it, Virtch,” he says when she’s stuck on the phone, and picks Sophie up.

“Thank you,” she mouths at him, before turning her attention back to the call. 

He drops her off, and then makes a trip to the grocery store because Tessa’s fridge is unbelievably empty, and buys her a bottle of wine for good measure. When he arrives back at her house, she’s visibly exhausted, spread out on the couch, eyes closed with her fingers pinching the bridge of her nose.

“Hey, kiddo. Guess what I got?” He says, holding up the bottle. He pours her a glass, and she accepts it gratefully.

“Oh my god, does it make me a bad mother if I’m drinking at four in the afternoon?”

“No, it makes you human, T. Relax. I’ll pick her up, you can ride shotgun. Like old times, eh?” He says, nudging her side.

“You know, she’s been begging to go to the rink,” she says after a moment, taking a sip of her wine.

“Wait, Virtch. Are you telling me you haven’t brought her to the rink?” He says incredulously.

“Hold your horses, we’ve brought her there a few times. But not since-” Tears fill her eyes, and she looks away.

“I’m sorry, T,” he says genuinely, and allows her to rest her head on his shoulder.

“It’s just so painful. That he’ll never-” she shakes her head, unable to continue.

“It’s okay, I know." He says, letting her know that he's here for her.

“I just. It used to be our thing, and to see all the kids with their parents and to know she’ll never have that-”

“Hey, tell you what, I have the keys to my aunt’s rink. If you want, we can go tonight, there won’t be anyone there. If you want,” he offers.

“I would like that,” she says, taking him aback because he didn’t expect her to be so open to the idea. 

It’s not until they get to the rink that Scott realises why Sophie has been so insistent on going to the rink, and it happens when Tessa is in the bathroom, leaving both of them on the ice. She’s holding onto him for dear life, but then she stops by the boards and leans against them, not moving.

“Hey, Elle. You okay?”

“Yeah,” she says with a sigh, looking into his eyes.

“You sure?” He asks.

“Uh huh,” she says unconvincingly.

“You know you can tell me anything, right?” He says, bending down to meet her eyes.

The little girl just nods passively.

“Okay. We can just stay here if you want to,” he says, leaning against the board with her.

She nods again, not meeting his eyes. After a moment, she asks, “How do you know Mommy?”

“Oh,” he breathes in, not expecting this question. “Well, we used to be good friends, when we were younger.”

“When you were my age?”

“We were a little bit older, but not by much,” he continues.

“And you guys were friends?”

“Yep. Your mom was my best friend,” he proudly says with a grin.

She looks at him, as if trying to search his face for answers.

“Sarah told me you guys skated together for a long time,” she says, eyes gleaming with curiosity.

“We did,” he nods.

“And you guys were the best?”

Scott shrugs, “we won a few medals.”

“Sarah also said you were in love,” she says quietly, suddenly becoming very interested in her fingers.

“That’s what we wanted people to believe when we skated. I guess it’s why they liked us,” he replies, laughing lightly.

“You weren’t in love?”

“It’s complicated, kiddo,” he says, letting out a sigh.

“Why?”

“Because we were in a sport, and we’d committed to skating together. And we didn’t want any distractions getting in the way, you know?” 

“So you guys weren’t girlfriend boyfriend?” She asks with the innocence only a child could have. He laughs at her straightforwardness.

“No, even though a lot of people wanted us to be,” he admits, blushing.

“How come I didn’t meet you for so long?”

And there it was, the million dollar question.

He feels his heart in his throat.

“Well, your mom and I, we stopped skating,” he says quietly. It feels as if the rink was cooled down by a hundred degrees.

“Why?” 

“Because we agreed it was time to move on with our lives, separately,” he explains.

“Oh. And she got married to daddy, right?”

“Yes, she did,” he nods, relieved at how quickly she’s been able to catch on.

“Did you get married to anyone?”

“Yeah, but we aren’t together anymore,” he says sadly.

She frowns, as if not understanding, and follows up with “But why weren’t you still friends?”

“Elle, kiddo, sometimes, grown ups make choices, and sometimes it might not have been the right one. And that can be hard, especially when you’ve spent the past twenty years with the same person in your life, to know what the right choice is. Your mom and I, we only knew each other. And after we stopped skating, we needed some space from each other,” he confesses. He feels as if a weight has been lifted off his chest, and silently wonders if he’d just unloaded too much information onto a child.

To his amazement, she nods, as if understanding completely.

“But why did you stop being friends?” Her brows furrow, apparently still trying to connect the dots.

“We were young, and we didn’t know how to handle our relationship, so we just drifted apart.”

“But she was your best friend,” she says, in an almost accusatory tone. 

“I know, kiddo, trust me. Your mom was the best thing that happened to me, still is the best thing. And trust me when I say that I still loved her, even when we stopped talking, even when we were upset at each other,” he says genuinely, smiling softly at her.

“You were mad at mom?” Sophie asks, as if it was the most unbelievable thing she’s heard.

“We were angry at each other, for a while,” he says, embarrassed. 

“Are you still angry?”

“No, not anymore. But I was, when we moved on, and so we stopped talking for a long time,” he says. It’s painful to remember what it was like four years ago, how jealousy and rage coursed through him, burning everything in its way.

“Why were you angry?”

“I thought I’d lost her, Elle. I thought I’d lost my best friend. And I was sad, for a while. But I’m not anymore.”

“Why’d you lose her?”

“Okay, how do I explain this? Let’s say Sarah and you, you guys are best friends, right?” He begins, struggling to find the best way to explain his situation to her.

“Uh huh! Sarah’s the best,” she says with a smile.

“That’s great. Well, let’s say you and Sarah are best friends. What happens if one day Sarah had a new friend, and she spent all her time with that new friend?”

“I would feel sad, because she’s my best friend,” Sophie says, frowning.

“Right, well, I was sad too, kiddo. But I was happy because your mom was happy, because she had your dad, and she loved him. So it made me very confused.”

“Because you were happy and sad at the same time.” She concludes.

“Exactly.”

Satisfied with his explanation, she smiles at him.

“Were you and mom as good as them?” She asks, pointing at the pair of ice dancers who are practicing their twizzles on the ice.

“We’d like to think so,” he says, and her eyes light up.

“How many?” She questions excitedly. She’s practically bouncing up and down on her toes.

“How many what, Elle?” He asks softly.

“Medals. How many did you win?" She asks eagerly.

“A few, give or take," he says humbly.

“So, you guys were good, then?"

“We were the best,” Tessa says, placing her hand on his shoulder. Scott wonders how much of their conversation she’s heard.

_“I’m sorry," she says, tears streaming down her cheeks._

_“It’s okay, Tess. I know it’s hard," he soothes, wrapping his arms around her._

_She shakes her head, burying her face in her hands. It had been a particularly hard week of training in Canton, not to mention the feeling of homesickness overtaking them, coupled with the pressure of their second World Championships just around the corner. They hadn’t had the chance to make the commute back home, opting to train in the States to maximise any ounce of extra ice time they could get._

_“Remember, Tess. In the wise words of Marina Zoueva: ‘To be loved and to be in love, that is what it’s all about’” He says in a perfect mock impression of their coach. This evokes a chuckle from her._

_“You know, I’ve never understood the ‘be in love’ part,” she admits, still laughing._

_“I guess it’s because we’re supposed to portray lovers on ice? Or maybe it’s just part of her master plan to get us to eventually date. Makes our chemistry more believable, you know,” he deadpans._

_They meet each other’s eyes for a second before bursting into another round hysterical laughter._

_“Oh, Marina. You know, I wouldn’t put it past her.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! yes, i’m back with another chapter after realising how much i loved this little fic three months later. you know, one day i hope to write a fic that’s over 50,000 words, i think i would consider that as ‘making it’ as a fic writer. the admiration i have for writers who can stick with their storyline for that long is immense, but alas, i change my plot as i write so i never know what i’ll end up with. until next time, thank you for reading!


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